Monday, September 17, 2012

Just goes to show ya.....

.......even if all you shove in your hole is 'healthy' foods, if it's 6,000 calories of healthy food......a day......you're still going to gain weight.
*palmtotheface*

Now, I haven't exactly been an angel at the eating right thing, but I've been doing MUCH better the last week or two, than the last month.

Plus, I've been booze-free for 4 whole days now.
4 DAYS!

I need a metal. A big glittery, purple 'I'm Kick Ass' metal.
And if someone sends me that metal, I will wear it......with honor.

Anyways. So, booze-free, I've eaten lean proteins, nuts, veggies, hummus, yogurt, pita chips, the occasional chocolate-fest (ahem, a whole package of Oreos on Friday. Hey it was needed! There were demon's in my uterus!), and I've tried to limit my portions.

All good, right?! (Well, except the fat kid relapse on the Oreos.)

Right.

Well, then why the F*CKFARTS am I up another 3 lbs?!?!?!?!
Riddle me that Ghandi?!

Oh, ya, maybe it's because I've been mauling all that listed above, plus more, every minute of the day.

Humph.

Now, anyone surprised I gained?
Nope, me neither.

New plan.
Actually this is now my NewNewNewNew Plan. New Plan times quatro.

1. LIMIT!!!!!-Listen to your body you moron!!! If you're not hungry.......DON'T PLOW INTO AN ENTIRE CONTAINER OF COCOA ALMONDS!!!!!! For shit's sake.


2.  NO BENDERS!!!!!- If you're craving chocolate, or a taco, or a donut........DON'T GO OUT AND EAT 12 POUNDS OF THE SHIT!!! FOR 8 DAYS IN A ROW!!!! Allow yourself 1 'treat' a day. Whether that be ONE donut hole, or  ONE mini-snickers, or  ONE small nachos, whatever. But just ONE. And make it SMALL, for the love of love handles.

3. MOVE YOUR ASS!!!!!- You've been a lard ass heifer with your pooper eating up the couch for weeks now. GET YOUR ASS OUTSIDE AND EXERCISE!!!! If it's a 20 minute walk with the dog, DO IT! If it's a 1 mile run, DO IT! Hell, if you get a energizer bunny up your ass and run 5 miles, it doesn't matter what it is, just DO IT! EVERY DAY!!! Something.Every.Single.Day.

There.
That should do it.

LET'S START THIS WEEK STRONG FOLKS!!!!
Put down that cream puff!!!!
Throw away that wheelbarrow of french fries!!!
Move your ass!!!
READY......GO!!!!

OH, BTW, I had to add a word verification onto my comments section. Soooo sorry long time! It's just that if I get one more Anonymous email about a comment about generic ambien, viagra, or xanax I'm going to stab my computer screen. And it's work's computer screen. I don't think they'd like that very much. But after a few weeks, I'll take it down!! No worries!

11 comments:

  1. I've been getting several anonymous emails for weeks now! Thanks for the tip on word verification.

    Ok, now about your post!(which is more important lol)

    I really don't know you...but I plan to in less than two weeks! BUT I can't believe you have up beer for 4 days! Way to go!

    As for that gain, been there done that. And I know you probably get sick on hearing this..but give it to next week. :)

    Sandra

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  2. Hey concentrate on the positive chick! No beer 4 days is killer! Why you trying to lose weight and kick the beer for awhile? crazy! Congrats on the beer babe!

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  3. Congrats on giving up the beer for 4 days. Awesome.

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  4. 4 days???? You are the bomb dot com!

    Just one Snickers minature??? Ha ha ha...would never happen with me.

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  5. Giiiirl, maybe it's them meds you've been talking about. Don't be so quick to blame the oreos!

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  6. I think we are all in a "get back on track phase".

    You can do this sista! I know you can. And take that gorgeous puppy out for a walk, you'll both love it! *hugs u*

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  7. Honey - just go into your blog stuff and make it so you don't accept anonymous commenters - then you don't need word verification, mkay???

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  8. I know what's happening. Wanna' know? You gave up the booze so you're substituting with food. That's why people who quit smoking gain weight. Makes sense. I believe it will all even out when your body is over the shock of not having its dose of the drink! At least you're on top of it. I think you've got this under control!

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  9. I had a really great comment for you yesterday, but apparently I am too dumb for the word verification. It kept saying I did it wrong. Anyways, I need to join you in the New New New New Plan. None of my pants fit and that is not good.

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  10. The anon comments don't post. They just pop up in your email. The spaminator gets 'em for ya.

    Word verification? It must be the extra calories. I was gonna commiserate with you and share my HoHo story but I had to fire up my laptop just leave a comment. So no HoHo story for you :D

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