OK, no joke, here's my next few thought processes:
-Hmm, That's weird that they would sell expired yogurt at the store, I just picked that up yesterday.
I proceed to check the container to see how long it's good for after that date (like it would matter if I already think it's expired). Yep, says right there, 'Good for 7 days beyond sell-by-date'.
-Well, crap, what am going to snack on now?!
It's only May people!
Did I take a turbo-time-traveling-rubber-ducky machine to July? (Don't ask why it's a rubber ducky, I don't know where I get this shit.)
Then, not caring if it's supposedly a month old, I try to dig in with a fork that I grabbed out of my silverware container. (Just so you know, I keep all the spoons in their separate container, all the forks in theirs, and knives in another. They are all arranged OCD style on the top of my counter. There's no mixing them up.)
Did aliens abduct me while I took a little snooze under my desk today and swap out my
Jesus, Mary, Joseph, and St. Peter. (As my friend Draz would say.)
I think the only cure for The Ditz is beer-thirty. Yes?