Ten Things Thursday

Ok. Enough of the depressing crap. We need to lighten this ol' bloggy up!!!

Back from a little straight jacket vacation, the one.......the only........Ten Things of Random Crap to Brighten Your Day!!!!!
Enjoy.

1.   First, I want to let you know that I'm going to respond to each and every one of y'all's emails later today. I was going to yesterday, but ended up stressing my mind out so much that I got a stupid migraine. So yesterday I was horizontal all day cursing Satan and his mean pulsing pain in my eye sockets.

2.  I have lots to talk about. Lots.

Not really.

I've done nothing but normal mundane shit for 2 weeks.
Don't hate.

Well, last weekend was a smidge exciting.

My little brother, Mike, apparently has nothing better to do with his time and money than to dump it all into to some mutant huge mud truck, then race it on the weekends in random hickville communities located in BFE, with his little besty Brad. Because that's what we do here in the sticks people.......race trucks through ditches of the nastiest mud, all to win a little money and a purdy little trophy.
We are so redneck.

Anyways. It really is fun, and yes, VERY redneck. But fun none the less.

Last weekend, Mike had a race near my southern side of the state, so I ventured down to get my once a year experience of dirt and mullets and vehicles that aren't remotely legal to drive on a regular paved road.

That is a mud run. A straight dirt track, having ditches dug out for the 'mud bog' run and the 'hill and hole' run, surrounded by hillbillies and their trucks, all consuming copious amounts of the luxurious Natural Light.
My dream come true.

 Below is the first race Mike did, the Mud Bog. The goal being to get through the ditch at the fastest time. Without killing yourself, of course. It's blurry at the beginning, sorry, but gets better. Apparently my videographer skills are that of a toddler.

And here is his Hill and Hole run. Basically the same premise as the Mod Bug, only this has 'hills' and 'holes'.
And you'll hear, after the first hill, that this run didn't end the way we wanted it too.

I had more pictures of the truck and drivers, but they're in my other camera and I left it at home. *face palm*

3.  We had a unique visitor at my place of employment Monday night. I'm driving out of the parking lot and turn to look toward the back door of my building, and notice this boulder just sitting in the middle of the road. Odd. Upon further inspection the boulder was not a boulder at all. It had claws. And a tail.

Meet Walter, the gator snapping turtle of death.
Aero-Mach Lab's new mascot.

No joke, that thing was as big as VW Beetle tire. I thought it was going to bite my leg off.

So in my infinite wisdom, I of course want to rescue Walter from the scorching pavement and return him to the creek (pronounced crick) nearby. No biggie. I've picked up huge turtles before. I reach around and grab his shell by his back legs and proceed to lift and carry him over to the woods. That's when Walter got an attitude, craned his neck around and hissed at my ass, all the while moving his little turtle log sized legs up and down, and peeing all over my shoes. Awesome. This had me envisioning his claws doing major damage to my beautiful skin, so I promptly dropped him and went and got my friend Steve to take care of the problem.

And he is now living happily ever after back in the creek (crick). The end.

4.  Sooooooo, I'm looking for a new vehicular. See, I drive a Hyundai XG350 right now. It's a sporty little 4-door sedan. Leather, sun-roof, pretty. Well, Mr. Wiksten barely fits in the car (because he's a Goliath at 6'4"), let alone can drive it. That means we have to drive the gas chugging Dodge 4x4 everywhere we go. Not pretty.

We're thinking an SUV would be perfect. Big enough to fit my husband, and the 'future' children, and of course Wyatt, but small enough that it's not guzzling my wallet. We've been looking at SUVs that have a 3rd row seat, because of course Wyatt needs his own seat, duh, and we've really like a few of them.

First I thought I wanted a Ford Explorer. Well, after test driving one, I was not impressed. It drove like a truck and the back seat had like no room. Literally 4 inches of space between the seats. WTF?!

Second was a GMC Acadia. It was perfect! Except the reviews said it only got 13-17 mpg. Farts.

Third was a Honda Pilot.

Source

That test drive was Tuesday night. It was awesome. Except the fact that I drove it during rush hour, got stuck on the highway because of a wreck, had to bypass through downtown which made me want to shove a tire iron in my ear, then make it back to the dealership in one piece. Oh, then I thought I left my phone in the damn car, had to drive all the way back to the dealer, have 2, count 'em TWO, salesmen try and help me find it. Whole time.......it's in my purse.
Gahhhhhhhhh.

But I liked it.

Next up is a Toyota Highlander:

Source

And we're thinking that an SUV with a 3rd row isn't all that necessary, so we're looking into other SUVs.

Like a Jeep Grand Cherokee:

 

 And maybe some others.

We'll see. It's kinda fun looking for new cars!!

5.  I've been using this a lot lately:

Well, not a lot.

I've just been partaking in one of my little State Bank of Bern coffee mugs once a day, and not even every day, filled with the glorious taste of hot cocoa and coffee. Yummmmmmmers.

Remember how I gave up coffee.......I don't know.................like 8 months ago?????

WTF was I thinking?!?!?!

Hot Cocoa + Coffee = Love

6.  The Today Show is in London this week. Well, not the Today Show, but Mr. Matt L. And every time I see anything London or Olympics or whatever, I think of Miss Beth Ann!!

So jealous of that little chica and her trip there!!!

7.  Looky looky at my new nail color!!!!!!

It's called Gumdrop! I bought it for a friend of mine and kept looking at it and looking at it (because I'm a lazy ass and haven't gotten it in the mail to her yet), and finally just couldn't take it any more. I went out and bought my own bottle and painted them the other day!

I heart that color so hard.

8.  We got approved to start repairing this new product at my job yesterday. 

My life is going to be busier than 50 cent spanking night at the strip club.

Not excited. Not excited at all.

9.  Weeelllllllllll. I finished the Shade's of Grey series.

Yup, that's right. I like to read smut.

Actually, since everyone's doin' it and all, I figured I needed to do it too. I can't just be left out!!!!

It was, um, not bad. The story line was really good. You know, super hot, young, entrepreneur meets pretty, poor, shy, college student and he whisks her off in a private jet to Europe and buys her pretty funderpants. What's not to love?

However the sex scenes..............Just a smidge graphic for Midwestern me. I mean, some were about as R rated as any normal movie. I can handle that. But then a few others were like, "Whoa, he just stuck his pinky finger in what hole?" Seriously.

All in all, I like the 2nd and 3rd book the best. They got more into the characters 'lives' and personalities, than the first book. Truly, I think if you took all the super descriptiveness out of the sex scenes, they'd still be good books. Maybe even better books.

10.  Don't forget!!!! Mother's Day is May 13th!!!!

Cheers Lovies!!!