Tuesday, September 27, 2011

I did it!!!

I freaking got up this morning at 4:40 in the AM baby!!! And went outside and RAN!!! Shitlebits, it was tough. Really tough. I slammed my palm into the alarm then threw it across the room to shut it the hell up, dragged my tired pooper out of bed, then just stood in the hallway.....contemplating.

Now, first I got to tell you, I am NOT a morning person. AT. ALL. (Obviously if I've been 'talking' about getting up at 4:30am for 2 months now, but only just got up this morning, it signals 'not a morning person'.) You should just stay away from me in the mornings. Stay far far away. Until I have at least a bathtub of coffee, there could be violence and definitely there is NO clear thinking. (Although for some reason my adorable husband does not follow the 'do not bother, its too early in the morning' rules. He loves to pick on me. Like a ornery 10 year old mischievous stupid boy type of picking on me. Like gives me a wet willy while I'm still dreaming of frosty beverages and sandy beaches.  Someone remind me why I married that man.)

So for me to actually be up, then to be up contemplating anything, straight off puts me in a.....mood.  Who freaking contemplates at 4:40 in the morning?!  No one! Especially not a non-morning person.

Wanna know what I was contemplating?  Ya, I bet you do.

Just normal everyday things.  Like:

Ummm, it's dark outside. Like really dark outside.  Scary crazed boogeymen prey on stupid 'I think I can run' females in the dark. Outside.  What if I'm just jogging along and I don't see that broken up pavement, then faceplate on the concrete....2 miles from my house? What if I'm running and some rabid Cujo comes running out of a back yard and bites my ass?  What if aliens decide to 'study' the livelihood Park Shity this morning, then see me hocking loogies and coughing up a lung and think 'Well, that looks like an interesting specimen to bring back to Planet Usuckatrunning, lets beam it up shall we'? I could avoid the scary and just go to work super early....now that I'm up....and run after work.  But I know I won't. Because I'm a loser after work.  I should run now.  If I get sucked up by aliens, then lets just hope they have booze and shoe stores.

Seriously. These are my thoughts.

So I quit contemplating, got ready and tip toed out into the night....I mean morning.  And you know what, it wasn't that bad. It was actually kind of nice.  It was quiet, no bastard farmer in his Dodge dually trying to run me off the road, no kids walking their dog straight into my legs, no white trash no teethed mullet screaming at me from their low-rider 1983 S10 pickup. It was super nice.  And Cujo did make an appearance, by the way, but it didn't bite my ass off, just followed all sweetly behind me for about a block and then turned around.  Pretty sure I had to stop and check my pants after I realized he was behind me. Damn dogs that don't make a peep when they trot up to a person! In the freaking DARK! Leash your dogs people! Or get a damn fence. Jeesh.

And you know what else happened this early morning, on my run?  I got another PR!!! New record for a 5K is 31:29!!! Woop woop!  How is that even possible when last week I ate 4 sticks of butter, 9 cases of beer, and didn't run at all?  How, I ask you, how?  But I really don't care, because I did it! And I'm so proud of myself!

One little itty bitty tiny thing is I set a 'challenge' this week to run Monday thru Friday (totally inspired by my twinkie Angela) and didn't get up yesterday. So right off, my little challenge is an epic fail. But!!! I'm still going to keep trucking even though I didn't get all my days.....my new pair of TOMS will just have to wait. (That was my 'reward' for getting up 5 days this week.)  There's always next week to try it again!

Now I will leave you with a new purchase on my little vacation last weekend. Yes, yes, I will get pics up soon....hopefully tonight....of the vacay, just keep your granny panties on.  Anywhoozle, here's the new super pretty scarf I bought:
Wow, that picture doesn't even look like me.  Well hi there flat hair. And abnormally large schnoz. Lovely. Just lovely.
The scarf is tan with turquoise, purple, white, and brown. Then it has gold sparkly thread in it too.  Sooo pretty!! 50% off too. Oh yeah.

I am now a scarf person.  Does this make me more cool? Lord I hope so.


  1. Fabulous scarf! And glad Cujo didn't bite your ass off. :)

  2. Good job with the run, I was up at 6 this morning, but all I did was pee and go back to bed. Gah! you make me feel like a sloth.

    Scarf Person = Totally cool, I have like 7 of them and I'm the coolest person I know! hehehehe

  3. Cujo knew how badass you were and that if he bit you you probabaly in your morning mood barked at him like Wyatt. /nod

    Oh...and speaking of the son...what was Wyatt doing while Momma was up contemplating at 4:40 in the satans butt crack of dawn?

    My guess is snuggling in the covers quiet dog chuckling at you. /nod hee hee.

    And hi...there is no planet usuckatrunning kkthx. You would totally go to goddessofbreakingherPR planet.

    *heart you with puffy YOU AMAZE ME in gold sparkles*

  4. So proud of you for getting up (I will be nice and not mention that while you were running from Cujo I was snoring in my warm bed...oops, I guess I just did). I am also not a morning person and I think even if Freddy Krueger himself broke into my house at 4:00 am he would just have to kill me cause I wouldn't be running anywhere!

    Love the scarf too...you're totally cool ;)

  5. You are so funny and creative. I want to be you some day.

  6. HAHAHAH Planet Usuckatrunning.

    Stop putting yourself down. (Though, you do it in such an amusing way.) You're getting up at the crack of dawn to run. Two things I will never do concurrently.

  7. I am so proud of you for the 4:40 run! Not this chick. Something would have to be on fire or bleeding for me to get out of the bed before 6:30 a.m. I love the scarf! Does that mean if I wear one I can be a cool mom?

  8. I can always rely on your posts to make me laugh no matter how crappy the day has been. congrats on running at 4:40am. you couldn't drag me out of bed that early if my apartment was on fire, haha.

  9. New PRs rule!!! Good for you for getting up early. My routine starts back next week and it will be tough to get going again. But it feels so good, yeah??

  10. You are all kinds of awesome-sauce! Way to go getting up at dark 30 to go run! :)

  11. I like the scarf. Which color Tom's are you getting? I was eyeing a pretty sparkly black pair over the weekend. :)

  12. yelled NOOOOOOOOO at the computer and laughed HARD at the 'no teethed mullet" comment

    love the scarf, turquoise is my fav color.....and your nose is not big.....just sayin'

  13. Yeah for you - I used to be a crazy ass morning person, even preggers I still got up at ungodly hours to work out. Now I have my coffee first. So I'm giving you two hands up WHOOT WHOOT. You must have had a great weekend away if you didn't get up yesterday!! Just sayin'


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