Thursday, August 23, 2012

Ten Things Thursday

Hello there.
Here's another round of TTT for your viewing pleasure!

1.  Last night I went out to dinner with my aunt, uncle, cousin, grandma, and another couple. We went to Olive Garden. Holy fat kid loves pasta. I had some shrimp appetizer, bread and mozzarella fonduta, then salad, 27 breadsticks, and finally Chicken & Shrimp Carbonara.

I am still full this morning.

But it was great to see my Grandma!! She's just the cutest little ol' lady. She lives in AZ, near Tucson, so I rarely get to see her.
Well, that's good lighting.
Oh! And do you see what she's drinking?! Yup, that's a margarita! The waitress was like, "And what would you like ma'am?" And cute little Margie said, "Well, I want a margarita. On the rocks." We all just giggled. 80+ and still knocking them back.

2.  Oh, before we went to dinner, I stopped at my aunt and uncles house to kill some time. First, I got my ass ripped for bringing my own beer. Seriously? How was I to know my uncle had already gone to the liquor store and stocked up?! I just figured I'd bring a small 6-pack and that way we're all covered. Ohhhh NOOoooooo. Not good apparently. It was like I murdered a midget clown or something. Tragedy.

Don't worry Larry, I will NEVER bring my own beer over again. Lesson learned.

Second thing that happened. I walked into their bathroom, you know....too much beer already, and found this:

Who has 1040 Tax Form TP?! Who?
Where do you even buy that kind of crap?
Do they sell it at Wally World? Right next to the Hannah Montana TP? And the Cable Bill themed Paper Towels?
Inquiring minds would like to know.

Although, it was kind of refreshing to wipe my ass with a portion of a government tax form.

3. I have had a strange and borderline psychotically obsessive relationship with Hot Fudge Sundae Pop Tarts. I've had them every morning this week.


4. Thank you all for your comments yesterday on what outfit to wear. From y'all's opinion and other non-blogger's opinion it's basically a tie between the black belt/shoes and the brown belt/shoes. I'll write a little post about which one I chose after this weekend.
So y'all will have to wait in complete suspense till then.
But not really.

5.  However, I'll show you what I'm wearing today and it's super cute!
Rebecca made me laugh when she was taking the picture, that's why I have that cheesy grin on my face.

6.  You know when you come home, and see this in the backyard......
the dynamic in your household is about to change. A lot.

And what I mean by that is there will start to be strange noises floating up from the basement that sound similar to turkey gobbling and a deer grunting, not at the same time, mind you. You will also start to see lovely camo EVERYTHING laying around EVERYWHERE. Camo hats, gloves, shoes, pants, coats, shirts, underwear, jock straps, nail polish, face paint.....ok, maybe not all of that. Bottles of deer urine start mysteriously start appearing out of no where. And finally, every weekend (and sometimes during the week) for about 3 months you will relax in the luxury of your home. All.By.Your.Self. Because your husband will be out trying to kill your food. So generous of him.

I'm not going to lie folks. Some wives hate hunting season......not this chica. I get to leave the house a mess, I can lay around and eat Pop Tarts all day, I can wear ripped up ratty pajamas all weekend long (not like I don't do that now or anything), and I can sleep in as late as I want on the weekends because someone has already left the house 2 hours before the asscrack of dawn, when you were still knee deep in your REM state of bliss.

Bring on the critters baby!!!

7. This weekend I have my cousin Pat and Tessa's wedding. I am so stinking excited I could just pee glitter! They are just:
It's an outdoor wedding. And of course this weekend is the first chance of rain that we've had in like 32 years. But I'm pretty confident we'll be fine. Don't worry Tessa!!!!

It's also going to be in Manhattan, my old college stomping grounds! Yesssss! (Except that it's the first weekend after school started, so there's going to be about 22,000 young, dumb, and first time drunk students running around that I'm going to want to shank. About a million times. With a spork.)

And big bonus is this is the side of the family that loves to party. I mean like loooovvvvves to party. Here, I just got this email from another one of my Aunts this morning:

Laura, I get into KC on Fri. at about 6 pm, will NOT be in Manhattan until Sat.  We'll party then.  Casey & I have a room at the motel (Parkwood Inn) Sat. night.  Get ready to partyI have been practicing.  See you soon.
Love,   jeannie

Apparently Jeannie's ready to party.
I'm confident I can fulfill that request Aunt Jeannie!

'bout right.
9.  Speaking of work.
I don't wanna.
At all.

10.  Ok, that's all I got. I know, these last few really sucked donkey balls. What can you do. Have a fantastic weekend everyone!!!



  1. Pop tarts give me horrible heartburn. Not that that has stopped me from indulging on occasion. I like the s'mores flavor!

  2. LMAO. That TP is unreal. Tax TP? Who knew!

  3. your cousin pat and tessa look like the housewives of atlanta--Kim!
    Cute pic of you and I love the tp..he probably put it out special for you guys...too cute!

  4. this was a funny post! thanks for making my day.. can't wait to hear about the "partying"!!! Have fun!

  5. dang, look at that tiny little waist

  6. My grandma is in her 90's, still lives on her own, and has her happy hour every afternoon. It usually involves vodka. Preservative?

    Your grandma is ADORABLE! Your outfit today is pretty darn cute, those boots!

  7. Love that grandma had a margarita!! You sure do go to a lot of weddings :)

  8. I craved pop tarts when I was pregnant. I'd eat half the box while shopping, before hitting the check out!
    I didn't know about that flavor, and I'm going to forget you told me about it!

  9. OMG...have you tried the smore poptarts? They are sheer heaven.

    And I wish I had your 80 year old margarita drinking granny. She is precious!

  10. I giggled at the TP. I always wondered who would buy that kind of thing. Now I know!

    Super cute outfit!!

  11. GRANDMA IS AWESOME! I'm adopting her. She's now my gma, too.

    That tax form TP is awesome. Seriously. I need to know where he got it. I'll only put it out when guests are over. =P

    Also, please tell me you chose the brown. Cuz that shit was cute.

    I LOVE hunting season, we only really do dove season around here, because there's not enough forest (sadface) for deer to roam in. I need to move where a man in a loincloth can bring food home. Damnitall!

    Have fun at your party! At least you'll be away from the hot fudge sundae poptarts for a few days! :D


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