Canning, Shoes, and Smurfs. What more does a girl need?

Holy Toledo batladies! I have so much to tell you!

I've been living my batshit crazy freakish life that has damn near done me into a straight jacket.  Seriously.
And what's with all the 'bat' references?
Whatever.
Moving on.

First, was another fun 'Canning Weekend'!  (Yes, it's almost Wednesday before I finally have 2 miliseconds to sit down and write about last weekend. Get over it.) Homemade salsa this time chica's. Ieeeii-Yiiii-YIIIII. And it went fairly quick. (Maybe because I was sober this time? Naaaa.)

One ENORMOUS pot of salsa goodness.
It looks small....oh, but it isn't.

Canning station in full force. Check.

Moving salsa to jars. Check.

And we have completed our canning mission!

I haven't tried any....except for the 8 cups I had while making it, you gotta taste test peeps....but I'm pretty sure it's Baaaaad Aaaaasssssssss.

Ohhhhhhh! And of course there was some shopping last weekend too.  I did meet my 'work out 5 days a week' goal, which rewarded me with a killer dress.....and shoes.....and a belt.  Most excellent. Draz: This would be the time to get that towel.  No need to ruin another keyboard with drool. And tell Rambo that screen licking is mandatory.

You likes??!! All for $28. (With a $10 off 'I'm a shopping goddess' coupon.)
OK, I just added the goddess part. It's fine.

Total $84! Shoes, belt and dress!
BAR. GAIN. SHOPPER. Don't be a hater.

Besides the whole 'I've gotta meet my goals so that's the only reason to spend money I don't really have' thang, my besty friend in the whole entire world is having her bachelorette party this weekend and I just didn't have a thing to wear. Right. Hence.....cutestest outfit on the planet.  Can I just say I'm so freaking excited!  Not only for the new dress, but because I can actually put together an entire outfit and I don't look like a 97 year old crack whore dressed me? (Which is what I normally look like when I try to mix up the Ts and jeans with something 'trendy'.)

Then Monday came.

And all that was lovely and rainbows came crashing down like a foot on a bag of burning poop. (Sorry Draz.) (Not like I've ever done that.) Monday: With it's demon horned cursing obscenities self.  Freaking bastard Mondays. I CURSE you with the most evil spell!

Yup. You guessed it. I accidentally exploded a colony of Smurfs all over the back half of my office. 

This is after we cleaned up the floor, the garage door, the grey door, the back of the printer, a fan, numerous papers and plexi-glass cutouts, and if the ceiling wasn't 25 feet in the air....that too.  This is also only about 1/10th of the damage, by the way.

Genius me left a half gallon container FREAKING FULL of ink on the back of the devil printers (I use monstrous printers about the size of Rhode Island to print things, and they are possessed by Satan himself and they torment me daily...just for fun) and it fell off and splattered blue ink everywhere, which you can see....and also, you can not clean up with water, soap, spit, bitching and moaning or anything, all over my freaking shop. Slash my office.

Good times.

Oh, and yes, that is metal sheeting on the wall and a huge garage door because I work in a oversized farm building. Totally normal office in hickland.

Just everyday fantasticness in LauraBelleLand. 

And today wasn't much better.  But....a nice frosty beverage cures what ails ya.
Wow, that sounded backwoods.

Anyway, I bought a new salad spinner, so now all is right with the world.

Don't'cha just love it how I change topics like a Lindsey changes swimsuits on her birthday?